Forgive and be Free

Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free. John 8:32

Forgive.

What kind of emotions rise up when you hear that word?

Hurt
Resentment
Shame
Anger
Bitterness

Does that word hit your Achilles tendon bringing a pain within your soul which seems to immobilize you?

Let me start by saying that I UNDERSTAND! Totally and completely, because I have experienced every emotion that comes from being offended, not just once, but many times. Oh yes…I understand. And it is for this very reason that I want to address this topic. You see, I was in a trap of offense and unforgiveness for a long time in the earlier years of my life. Through the grace of God, a heaven-sent mentor, countless tears and prayers, I finally found the freedom that comes only when we learn to forgive those that have hurt us.

I am not going to tell you that forgiving someone is an easy process. The truth is that the choice to forgive is often a painful process. This is especially true if you have carried an offense for years as I did at one time. After repeated times of being hurt, you learn to build barriers. I know, because I got really good at gathering bricks. With those bricks, I built walls around my heart. Not one wall but many walls. I put up walls around my heart every time a person offended me. My thinking was that these walls would protect me and my heart from further pain. Nothing could have been further from the truth.

A wall may keep someone from coming in…but it also keeps a person from the freedom to escape.

And so there I was with walls to “protect” myself. But I soon realized that I was not alone behind my walls. My heart and I were trapped within the walls with two miserable evil companions…Bitterness and Offense. I will be the first to tell you that these demonic twin forces had no intention of leaving me because I had made them welcome. I was in a trap. The astounding part of my dilemma is that I was holding the key to escape my prison but I just didn’t know it. I had no clue that the key to my freedom was in the key called FORGIVENESS.

Hosea 4:6 tells us that people are destroyed for lack of knowledge. It is in the revelation of truth that we find freedom but there is a choice that comes with that revelation.

Choosing to hold on to unforgiveness fortifies a trap. Do you know who the trap has been set for? Surprisingly, the snare is NOT for the person who hurt you. It is for you just as it was for me for far too long! Let us look at God’s Word and these words of Jesus from the gospel of Luke.

Then He said to the disciples, “It is impossible that no ^[a]offenses should come, but woe to him through whom they do come! ² It would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck, and he were thrown into the sea, than that he should ^[b]offend one of these little ones. ³ Take heed to yourselves. If your brother sins ^[c]against you, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him. ⁴ And if he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times in a day returns ^[d]to you, saying, ‘I repent,’ you shall forgive him.” Luke 17:1-4 (NKJV)

Did you catch that? Jesus said to his disciples that offense WOULD come. Not maybe. It is a given. Jesus even used the word ‘impossible’ to make his point that offense cannot be escaped. Then he went on to say that we are to forgive…and forgive…and forgive…all those who sin against us.

In order to fully understand the vital truth of how an offense can ensnare a person, I will share a bit of a word study here. In the New Testament scripture, the word ‘offense’ is defined and/or translated in a very interesting context. The Merriam Webster Dictionary, The Strong’s Concordance and the Thayer’s Bible Dictionary all use these words interchangeably to define offense:

-an act of stumbling

-a cause or occasion of sin

-the act of attacking

-the state of being insulted

-a trap or a snare

-an impediment placed in the way and causing someone to stumble or fall (a stumbling block)

-any person or thing by which someone is (entrapped) drawn into sin

Friends, are you seeing this yet? An offense is a trap! If you are still not convinced let me share this vital bit of information. In Luke 17:1, the word offense originates from the Greek word ‘scandalon’ according to the Strong’s Concordance. Scandalon is a noun, and the Concordance defines it as “A trap stick that is a snare, an occasion to fall, a thing that offends, a stumbling block.” There you have it, my friends. When you become offended and you hold onto the offense by refusing to forgive your offender, you have fallen into the trap that the enemy of your soul set for you.

Forgiving someone is a choice. No not an easy choice but a necessary choice. Necessary to find healing…to find freedom…to move on.

Choosing to forgive people who have hurt you does not make your offender right.

Choosing to forgive another person simply means you are ready to be free from the trap of an offended heart.

I understand.
I was there.
More than once!

In my book, Nuggets from the Heart, I devoted an entire chapter, with my personal testimony of how God freed me from offense and unforgiveness. In the designated chapter of the book, I explain so much more about the danger of holding on to an offense and the importance of forgiving people. It was one of the most difficult chapters to write but my prayer in doing so was that somehow my story would help others to find the same freedom I was able to experience.

Even today when an offense is trying to knock on the door of my heart, I have learned to forgive quickly and purposefully. Having lived with the pain and turmoil of an offended heart at one time, I know I do not want to fall into that trap again.

I know that for someone reading this post today, there is a person or perhaps more than one person, whose face has surfaced into your mind. Someone hurt you. Someone offended you. You want to be free of that offense but you feel trapped. Friends, it comes down to a choice. A choice that only you can make…just as I had to. We can know the truth but in order to be set free, we have to decide what we will do with that truth.

If you are struggling with an offense or forgiving someone I want to pray for you. You don’t need to leave all the messy details. Just leave a comment saying “pray for me.”

I will do that for you because I want you to experience the same freedom I did by God’s grace.

It truly is all about God’s grace when it comes to extending a forgiving hand. You will never be able to do it in your own strength. But God will give you what you need to forgive your offender no matter how deep the pain is. He wants your pain gone even more than you do.

The first step is yours. Make the decision to begin your journey to emotional freedom.

Choose to forgive. You will not regret it!

 

 

 

 

 

Note: This blog post was written by Rosie Williams and first appeared on Nuggets from the Heart. This blog post, either in part or in its entirety, may not be copied, duplicated, edited or appear in any other publication without the written approval or permission from the author. For full copyright and disclosure information, click here. For questions regarding the use of this blog post, you may send an email to Rosie Williams by clicking here.